Sloane Grammar School Hortensia Road Chelsea London England

Click here to go to bottom.

 
Gone But Not Forgotten

You may think you're done with the past but the past isn't done with you!

"The merits of a school are judged as much by the men it produces as by their achievements as boys" - 

(Old Cheynean D.J. Cowie, March 1929)
 

REGISTER AND LINK UP WITH OLD SCHOOL FRIENDS AGAIN AND BECOME PART OF SLOANE REUNITED

YOU'LL NEED TO REGISTER FOR YOUR WEBSITE TO CREATE YOUR OWN PERSONAL PASSWORD AND VIEW ALL OF ITS PAGES. IF YOU HAVE A VALID SLOANE CONNECTION JUST CLICK ON THE BUTTON BELOW. BUT CHOOSE CLASSMATE PROFILES AT THE TOP FIRST TO SEE IF WE'VE BEEN EXPECTING YOU. IF YOUR NAME'S THERE CLICK ON IT AND FOLLOW ON-SCREEN INSTRUCTIONS
 

IT'S FREE, IT'S EASY, IT'S SECURE

You're Never Alone As A Sloane

IF YOU'D PREFER MORE INFO BEFORE COMMITTING YOURSELF, CLICK ON THE ENVELOPE BELOW AND SEND ME A DIRECT EMAIL -

 

Self-portrait by Stefan Bremner-Morris

  SEE ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND UPDATES FURTHER DOWN, AND CHECK THE CALENDAR AT THE FOOT OF THIS PAGE TO SEE WHAT'S HAPPENING.

   IF YOU'RE ALREADY A SITE MEMBER PLEASE REMEMBER TO KEEP YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS UP TO DATE USING EDIT CONTACT INFO IN THE LEFT HAND COLUMN.

Come on in! 
Don't be late! 
This is one detention 
You'll be pleased to take.

 

                                         A WARM WELCOME 

to fellow Cheyneans and passers-by, from the Official Sloane Grammar School 1919-1970 Old Cheyneans and Friends web site.

Mark Foulsham created this site in August 2008 to record for posterity all that I can, and for all those who attended Sloane or simply has a Sloane connection, to share and enjoy. Feel free just to browse or, if you feel you qualify to join us, make full use of the site by becoming a Registered Classmate.

Click on the Click Here to Register button above to start the registration process. It's Free!

I'll also be happy to send a personal invitation to anyone else with a Sloane School Chelsea connection who you think might like to join us. Just enter their Email address in the MISSING CLASSMATES  box to your right and click Send Invite.

Aspirations and Objectives

Sloane never had a motto so I'll adopt the one to be found on the Coat of Arms of the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea as it suits us nicely -

Quam Bonum In Unum Habitare

(What A Good Thing It Is To Dwell Together In Unity) 

It is hoped, in some small way, to be able to have similar objectives to those stated for the first issue of The Cheynean in December 1926  -

"To record faithfully the major activities of the School, to promote and foster a corporate spirit in the School, to excite a greater keenness both in the games and in other phases of its social life, and to serve as a link between present members of the School and the Old Cheyneans".  -

and also to bring together, once again, old friends and classmates, and those of us who have outlived the school and share a common interest in its history and its future.

If you've any memories of Sloane you'd like to share, use the Contact Us page to send them in and, whilst you're there, register for the site as well. 

Once you've registered, you can activate the Instant Messaging feature that allows you to hold a 'real-time' online conversation with anyone else who has logged on to the website. You can also send a message to someone else on the site via the Message Centre page but, if you're expecting a swift reply, it might be worthwhile using their Profile on the Classmate Profiles page, to see what part of the world they're living in these days, and to have an idea of the time where they are. Use the Clocks below, to check.

After you've registered, why not take a look at all the Classmate Profiles ? Even if you don't know the person involved, the information they've put on their Profile can be interesting, illuminating and fun, and often brings back memories of something you thought you'd forgotten about.

If, at any time, you're unsure about anything click on this Using The Site link for an explanation or contact me direct via the Contact Us page.

Why Not Take a Look at Where your Classmates are Living?

Find out the Postcode of a Classmate from their Profile (if they've agreed to let everyone know it) then Click on the link below, enter the details where it says 'Address', then Click on 'Go'. Not every country is covered yet and those that are have limited coverage, but it's worth a try.

Here's the link. Have fun - http://www.vpike.com/

* * * * * * * * *

Sloane in 1908 and much as it looks today

The Sloane building was 100 years old in 2008, although it didn't actually start life as a boys' school until after the First World War, during which it served as a hospital. It still stands and many memories are, no doubt, ingrained in its walls along with the odd name and ribald comment. Who knows what the future holds, despite its Grade II listing on May 7th, 2002. Grade II listed buildings can be altered, extended, or even demolished, but only with Local Authority consent, so it may be that the building is considered historically or architecturally interesting enough for it's fabric to remain untouched. Some consideration may have been given to it having been the first purpose-built secondary school in London, and it is certainly one of only 3% of all ages of listed buildings that was built in the 20th century. Schools generally are seen as a good investment by developers because they're easy to convert. They are likely to be structurally sound because the authorities will have inspected them regularly to ensure they comply with Health and Safety requirements. 

Sadly, Sloane Grammar School for Boys only lasted 51 years, from 1919-1970. Should the building survive in the form we all remember, there is still a chance that some of us will be around in 2019 to make use of the building to celebrate what would have been its centenary as a boys' school, had the school remained in existence.

Should any of you be interested, or even in a position to buy one, detailed floorplans of the flats can be viewed at this link - www.thechelseaapartments.co.uk .

 
UPDATE ON BUILDING PROGRESS

The Kensington & Chelsea College website still has a live camera link to building progress. Take a look on this link and, once you're on the site click the 'Hortensia Webcam' link.

www.kcc.ac.uk/hortensia

Work on the new college building, is completed and the college is in operation.It sits in the playground that used to separate Sloane from Carlyle, and looks like this -

The flats, known as Milliner House, Chelsea Apartments, are ready for occupation at advertised prices between £785,000 and £2,350,000. Or, if you can afford it, the single penthouse at the top will set you back £5.85 million - and it's being sold as a shell!

It's now known that phase 2 of the project is conversion of the original Edwardian building into loft style apartments. It will be interesting to see how far they're allowed to tamper with the façade under its Grade II listing.

What's also interesting is that the old Chelsea College of Art and Design in Manresa Road, to which Sloane can trace its origins in its guise as the South-Western Polytechnic, is about to make way for a scheme involving 15 apartments and two town houses. There's no stopping 'progress'. 

The view from Fulham Road		The entrance to the apartments on Hortensia Road
A closer view of the apartments		The view of Fulham Road and the old St Mark' College from one of the balconies

 * * *

Whatever our own personal reasons for it doing so, the school will still haunt most of us even if it disappears altogether. With that tenuous link, here's a poem that I came across in an old copy of The Cheynean -

The Ghost of Sloane

When London's asleep and the School very quiet,
No sound of footsteps, no sound of a riot,
No sound of even the shuffle of feet,
No sound of the creak of a pupil's seat,
Out of the darkness the ghost of Sloane
Awakes from rest with a sigh and a groan.
Then up he arises to haunt the School
Climbing the stairs in the guise of a ghoul.
He shuffles and clanks down each corridor
Into the classrooms where stand desks galore.
He examines each desk and checks the boys' work,
Allots ghostly marks in the dark and the murk.

If you ever lose books from out of your desk,
And the teacher upbraids you and calls you a pest,
Just tell him my story, however tall,
Of the white shrouded phantom that haunts the School Hall.

                                                    J. Hollingshead (3C)

* * *

As for us, the boys who used to attend our Chelsea school, we probably considered ourselves 'Chelsea men' but I doubt that many of fitted the description in this poem, written when he was in the 5th year by one time Sloane Schoolboy, A R Doubledee. I get the impression he didn't particularly approve of the 'Beatniks' of the late 50s and early 60s that he found himself sharing Chelsea with or, as he called them the 'Weirdies' -

The Weirdies

The Chelsea man is excessively queer,
He only drinks coffee and doesn't like beer.
He's always "chatting" the girls, and yet
This seems to make him "one of the set".

His unkempt chin and uncut hair
Go with his feet which are usually bare.
If he wears shoes, they've never got soles,
And he's usually found in Bohemian holes.

His outsize sweater is generally black
Contrasting well with his shorty mac.
He wears his clothing merely to show
That he can keep up with the boys of Soho.

To find a girl he doesn't look far,
But into the nearest coffee bar,
Where he's sure to meet a Bohemian "yob".
They're all from Chelsea - what a mob!

The girls with hair right down their backs
Wear irregular clothes that look like sacks.
They walk about wearing father's sweater:
I really don't see why he should let 'er.

Their gaudy clothes of reds and greens
Match up with the style of their men-friends' jeans.
Now that's how it goes with the latest style:
Girls on their faces make-up pile,
The men wear anything they can find -
I shouldn't stare, I should just act blind!

A.R. Doubledee (5b)

* * * * * * * *

FRONT PAGE NEWS !

The New Year so far (continued)

I've had trouble sleeping so far this year and it's due, in the main, to next door's dog who's been barking all night. I've sorted it out now though. I took it out of their garden last night and put it in ours. See how they like it!

The barking has got us down though so we're off for a break. I was going to book a flight with EasyJet but my neighbour a Mick put me off the idea. He said that when he phoned them they asked him how many people would be travelling with him. He got angry anfd asked them how he was supposed to know. It was their plane after all.

He still went ahead and booked with them though and was impressed with their inflight service. He'd only been sitting down a few minutes when a stewardess asked him what he'd like to drink. Being Irish, he naturally asked for a whiskey. When she asked the Muslim gentleman next to him the same question she got a torrent of abuse and was told,

" I'd rather be ravaged by a dozen whores of Babylon than let liquor touch my lips!"

That was when Mick became a bit peeved and said,

"So would I! I didn't know we had a choice."

Mick said things got worse, and when they landed he was unable to find his luggage so went to the lost luggage office and told the woman on duty. She was very professional and smiled a lot, saying he was not to worry as he was in good hands. He only lost faith in her when she asked if his plane had arrived yet.

My sister will drive us to the airport. She's very safety conscious and even keeps a tool in her car that's designed to cut through a seat belt if someone gets trapped. She keeps it in the boot.

I should be fit enough for my break as I've continued with the diet I started last year. I went into Pizza Hut the other day and ordered just a small pizza to take away. They asked if I wanted it cut into 4 pieces or 6. I told them to make it 4 as I didn't think I could manage 6.

Talking of going away somewhere, what a coincidence about Sloane boys using the ill-fated Costa Concordia, as Clive Woosnam mentions on his The Woosnam Diaries page. Apparently, so Stefan Bremner-Morris tells me, Winston Churchill once cruised the Mediterranean on an Italian ship and when asked by Italian journalists why he chose an Italian ship, he replied,

"There are three things I like about being on an Italian cruise ship. First, their cuisine is unsurpassed. Second, their service is superb. Then, in time of emergency, there's none of this nonsense about women and children first."

Breaking News!!

Captain of the Costa Concordia Starts New Job!!

The Captain of the ill-fated cruise ship Costa Concordia, Francesco Schettino, decided very quickly that there was no future for him at sea. Today he started a new job as a bus driver -

Two Scotsmen Found Alive On The Costa Concordia!!
 

Whilst he was starting his new job, Italian divers found two more people alive on board the Costa Concordia! Two Scotsmen were found sitting at the bar but have refused offers of rescue. They say they're on an all-inclusive holiday and they've still got 12 days left.

Enough To Drive You Round The Bend

This is a true story.
 

A man has received 5 tickets in the post for driving without a seatbelt. He thought he'd got off Scot free after seeing a speed camera when he was out driving and, although he knew he hadn't been speeding, he thought he was bound to get a ticket for exceeding the limit. Just to be sure, he drove round again and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but the camera flashed again. He began to think this was quite funny so drove round three more times, going even slower each time. He was even laughing his head off as the camera flashed on the fifth occasion.

This is also true.

Former US House of Representatives Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, was at a function where a noted psychiatrist was the guest speaker, and decided to ask him a question,

" Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?"

"Nothing is easier," he replied. "You aask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If the person hesitates, that puts you on the track."

"What sort of question?" asked Pelosi.

"Well, you might ask, "Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?"

Pelosi thought for a moment and then said with a nervous laugh,

"You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."

Editor's Note: Personally, I prefer cracked people. They let in a
                         light.

* * * * *

Jokes of the Week (or until I can find more)

There is more humour in life than there is in some jokes.Take these letters sent to a South of England newspaper after they asked for examples of stupidity.

IDIOT SIGHTING #1

My daughter and I went to a McDonald's drive-through check-out window to pay our bill. I handed over a £10 note. As the totla bill was £9.20 I also handed over a 20p piece.

The girl behind the counter told me I'd given her too much money so I said I knew that but this way she could just give me back £1.

The girl then sighed and fetched the manager, who asked me to repeat my request. After I did so he just handed me back my 20p and said,

"We're sorry but we don't do that kind of thing", before asking the girl to give me back 80p in change.

IDIOT SIGHTING #2

We live in Moor Park, near Watford and had to have the garage door repaired. According to the GARADOR repairman, one of the problems was that we didn't have a large enough motor on the opener.

I thought for a moment then told him we had the largest motor they did at the time, a ½ horsepower.

He shook his head and said,

"Lady, you need a ¼ horsepower."

I responded that ½ was larger than ¼.

"Noooo, it's not", he said. "4 is larger than 2."

We haven't used GARADOR since.

IDIOT SIGHTING #3

My daughter went to the local Kentucky Fried Chicken and ordered a Taco. She asked the man behind the counter for 'minimal' lettuce.

He said he was sorry but they only had Iceberg.

IDIOT SIGHTING #4

I live in a semi-rural area. A new neighbour recently called the Highways Department to ask them to remove the 'DEER CROSSING' sign from our road.

She explained to them,

" Too many deer are being hit by cars on this stretch of road! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."

IDIOT SIGHTING #5

The traffic lights on the corner near us buzz when the lights turn red and it's safe to cross the road. I was crossing with a friend of mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.

I explained that it signalled to blind people when it was safe to cross.

Appalled, she responded,

"What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"

And this week's politically incorrect joke -

Mick and Paddy are reading headstones at the local cemetery when Mick calls out,

"Crikey, Paddy! There's a bloke here who is 152!"

"What's his name?" says Paddy.

"Mick replies,

"Miles. From London."

Thoughts For The Day (Or until the next ones)

The first novel ever written on a typewriter was Tom Sawyer.

The first couple ever to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

Coca-Cola was originally green.

Intelligent people have more zinc nd copper in their hair (Stop looking now!)

Life isn't about surviving the storm, it's about learning how to dance in the rain.

Life is like a toilet roll. The closer to the end it gets, the faster it goes.

Personal Ads

The personal ads you'll see here over time are genuine and taken from the London Review of Books personal ads section. It was started in 1998, intending to bring together people of similar literary and cultural tastes and has resulted in a funny and clever collection. I'll publish a different one each week and hope you enjoy them as much as I do and, if you ever spot any yourself,worthy of inclusion here, please let me have them and, so as not to give everyone the impression that you spend all your time looking at the personal ads, I'll withold your name on request! -

"92 - a retired physician / He couldn't know about his future ignition" - Fortean poet currently on the path to the world's first SHC epic - "For almost a century he'd been a fighter / Now a human cigarette lighter." Publishers, or desperate women please write to stigmatic man, 36, with uncanny powers of bi-location and the ability to bend raining frogs. Anti-gravitational love, and full back-catalogue of Orbis Publications' The Unexplained (Issue 2 free with Issue 1). Box no. 4459."

Editor's Note: This advertiser is thought to have been referring to the possible spontaneous combustion case of Dr John Irving Bentley in Coudersport, Pennsylvania in 1966.

AND DON'T FORGET TO CHECK THE 'WHAT'S HAPPENING' CALENDAR FURTHER DOWN THIS PAGE, OR TO SCROLL DOWN ALL PAGES AS THERE'S MORE TO SEE!

*

Sloane Information at the LMA

London Metropolitan Archives hold some information relating to Sloane. Some of the items are accessible if you visit the LMA at 40, Northampton Road, Clerkenwell, London, EC1R 0HB (phoning to make an appointment on 020 7332 3820 is advisable) but you will need to apply for a 'History Card' via their website if you intend printing copies of any of the items.

Go to the website at www.lma.gov.uk for full details. Clicking on the following link,
 

London Metropolitan Archives

will take you to a page on their site where you can enter 'Sloane School' in the Search Terms box and click on 'Run Search'. This will bring up all available items.

These include - 

Admission and Discharge Registers 1904-48, 1958-61 and 1964-66, a 1938 Plan of the school, drawings relating to Building Act case files 1935-57, and 23 photos of various school activities 1924-69, though some of these are listed as 'missing'.

Other items they hold are 'closed' under the 65 year rule that protects the confidentiality of living individuals. In other words, they can't be accessed for 65 years from the school's closure so will be available to the public in 2035.

However, these 'closed' items can be consulted by the LMA on behalf of individuals under the provisions of the Data Protection Act, so contact them direct if you're interested.

The 'closed' items are -

Log Book 1967-70 (Ref: LCC/EO/DIV01/SLO/LB/001)

Punishment Book 1962-70 (Ref: LCC/EO/DIV01/SLO/MISC/001)

Staff Registers -
1895-1963; 1965-70 (Ref: LCC/EO/DIV01/SLO/MISC/002-004)
 

* * * * *


CALENDAR OF EVENTS


All Forthcoming Events, And The Ones You Missed, Can Be Seen On The Calendar Below:-
 

Apologies for the adverts but it's cheaper for me if I allow them. 

Click on an event to learn more about it and on a gun to go backwards or forwards in time.